I seriously can't believe it, my undetermined 4 year old is now potty trained. (reference from previous blog) I bet your wondering how did I do it? It actually was easy and complicated all at the same time. Let me explain.
First let me say that your child has to be willing and interested in potty training. If not it won't work. I know there are many blogs, articles, and advice that talks about I potty trained my child in three days, by the age of 2 and all that lucky mess but I promise you after working with my son since the age of 1 1/2 if the child has no interest in it then it will not happen.
After "unasked" for input from my fiancé family I decided my son was smart enough and could get this but how to motivate him was the question. I will be honest on how I did it. There are several children his age that he plays with and they are working on potty training, just learned to potty, or are already potty trained so I used that as my motivation. I would say look how smart Ryker is, he is learning to potty. He is learning to not wear diapers anymore. Look at how big Dakota is, she is potty trained she doesn't wear diapers anymore. Wouldn't that be nice? You are just as smart as they are you can get this too. I encouraged him that he was just as big, just as smart to potty train all it took was him to want to.
Some might say that is a bad way to parent my child comparing him to others and making him not good enough because he is not potty trained and they are. I would say to you that you are totally missing the point. I was stressing to him that he is just as smart and just as capable as the other children that he knows to succeed at this obstacle and that he could tackle it. I know my child is very smart, as all of us mothers should think, but I think when I made him aware that his friends were potty trained and that he could do it that he had what it took to do it too that was what he needed to hear.
So the first day we started about 2 in the afternoon and he wore just underwear and a shirt whenever I seen him pull on himself I would tell him to go sit on his seat, most of the time it would result in nothing but after a while he did pee and I praised him telling him how proud I was of him and how he was my big boy! He did go twice and it was bedtime. I put a diaper on him for bedtime just because I didn't have pull-ups yet. I would say day 1 was a good success.
The second day started off with tears of not wanting to take diaper off, note to self must get pull-ups. After about 20 minutes of tears we were off to a hopeful day of potty training. By the end of the day we were successful and had used potty with no slip ups in underwear. I am so proud of him!!! On this day however, we did have to go to town so we did put a diaper on until we got back home just because we didn't want any accidents.
By day 4 we were on a roll and had this down pat. I am so glad that I just waited till I was sure he understood. Sure he probably did at a earlier age and could have saved myself a lot money on diapers but really once they are out of diapers then that truly means they aren't your babies any more and I guess I wasn't ready to let go of the diaper just as much as he wasn't. When they are that little you really don't want to let them go.
Here are my steps that I actually did to help him succeed at potty training.
- When I decided to start I had a talk with him explaining what we were going to do, that he was a big boy and that was a good thing. I also explained that being a big boy brought more advantages and told him a few of those.
- As soon as he got out of bed it was time to potty, diaper or pull-up came off and he used the potty
- I called pull ups underwear not diapers that way he doesn't think its okay I can pee in them they are just diapers if he thinks they are underwear he will try not to pee in them (most important of all I think)
- Teaching him to wipe his butt was and is a challenge that one will take some more time so be patient
- I leave baby wipes in bathroom for the above
- When teaching they will give you clues they have to go watch for them for him he would literally pull on his peepee when he needed to go or when he could feel that it was getting time so when I seen that I knew and would have him go. For pooping he would always want to hide so I knew after the first day he wanted to poop in potty because he got to flush and wipe his butt so it was new to him.
- REWARDS are your friend it doesn't have to be toys and candy it can be a trip to the park, his favorite meal cooked for dinner, or his favorite treat for snack. For our son it literally was to say a "bad word" which was "punk" he wanted to say that word so I said if you learn to potty you can say that. After the third day he got to say it. He was ecstatic. Not sure why my child thinks saying punk is a reward but hey it worked and he is potty trained so I ain't complaining. FYI by the sixth day punk had worn off and he didn't care about saying it anymore and still hasn't said it as of this update June 12, 2017
- Always be prepared when you go somewhere have a pull-up on and pull-ups in baby bag with baby wipes and change of shorts. It is called training for a reason. I just didn't feel like cleaning the car seat, him, clothes, and possibly my car when a simple pull-up will suffice.
- Do read books about potty training to let them know what is happening. They make some really awesome ones that are toddler friendly. Our favorite was "Boy's Potty Time", with a real feel potty seat on cover.
- Lastly I was patient and didn't harp so much on him I put the little potty in the room we stayed in the most and every time I seen him pull on himself I sent him to sit on his potty before you know it he was getting it. Once he was mastering the actual potty training, a few days, his father began teaching him standing up and holding it without spraying everything in sight (still work in progress)
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